Nagbago ka na

March 5, 2019
9:45 am

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“Hey guys, I’m here!” Chris Ravenna called out when he entered a room. He found Lolo Tasyo, Anthony Noir, Isidra and Paco looking at him. Ravenna was baffled about the stare given to him. It started to make him uncomfortable. “Guys?”

“Kuya, kailangan natin mag-usap.” (Brother, we need to talk.) Chris’ younger brother, Paco said with a concern on his face.

“Bakit?” (Why?)

“Sit down please, Chris.” Anthony Noir requested as the young fighter did what he asked. “Chris, we do not like what you’re behaving recently.”

“What do you mean?” Chris raised his eyebrow.

“Nagiging mayabang ka na po, kuya.” (You are becoming arrogant, brother.) Paco explained.

“Ano?” (What?) Chris completely denied it and laughed. “True that I’m arrogant but only at my enemies.”

“Hindi lang niyan kundi sa paglalakbay natin, nagbabago ka na dahil sa kababayaan mo.” (Not only that but also during our travels. You have changed because of your carelessness.) Lolo Tasyo responded as he stood up and looked in the arrogant wrestler eye-to-eye. The old man didn’t like his current conduct.

“Ano na naman po? Sinunod ko po ang tagubilin ninyo sa akin na maging disiplinado, at natupad ko po iyon. Ano pa po ang gusto ninyo po?” (What now? I have followed your direction to discipline myself, and I did. What more do you want, sir?) Chris showed that it was enough for him. He might not go further.

“Pero hindi lang dapat sa larangan ng professional wrestling kundi sa ugali mo, hijo!” (But not only in professional wrestling but also in your conduct, son!”) Lolo Tasyo rebutted, then added. “Hindi ka ba pa natuto sa mga tinuro ko sa iyo?” (Haven’t you learn anything from what I’ve taught you?)

Chris was tired of what he thought to be yapping, so he shouted. “ANO PA PO ANG GUSTO NINYO PO?” (WHAT MORE DO YOU WANT?)

SLAP!

Isidra used her right hand and slapped at him across the face. It almost like she hit him closer to the swollen left eye which became very painful.

“Nagbago ka na! Hindi mo na kilala ang iyong sarili. Dapat isa kang Pilipino. Pero ngayon nagiging katulad ka na ng mga kalaban mo.” (You ARE changed! You have lost yourself! You are supposed to be a Filipino, but now you are like them.) Isidra lashed out before she walked out in anger. Paco and Lolo Tasyo left the room to console her.

The room was now half-empty with Chris and Anthony face-to-face. Noir looked at the devastation of Chris’ face. Ravenna was indeed upset, but not angry. Isidra’s cold and harsh words hit him very hard.

“Pero hindi…” (But I’m not…)

March 6, 2019
Laguna, Philippines
7:30 am

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Chris and his group arrived back to his hometown at Calamba City, Laguna where he had a meeting with the mayor. Chris kept his promise that he will return there to celebrate. The town arranged a parade where Chris held the MAX-Japan Junior Heavyweight Championship, stood a parade float. Chris felt awful while the motorcade was ongoing. He didn’t want it to happen, but he has no choice but to wear a fake smile. He wished to get the event over with and went back to the training.

Chris was getting sick of the sponsors greeting him. They offered him as he was as a prostitute for them, selling himself in the name of greed. The hole has gone deeper for him. Anxiety choked him like it was killing him and forced him to submit. His hate for class status began to grow.

“Chris?”

Chris snapped out of it, and one investor woke him up from the trance. “Okay ka lang ba?” (Are you okay?)

Chris nodded without a word. “Para bang malalim ang iniisip mo, may gusto ka bang sabihin?” (It looks like you have deeper thoughts in your head, do you want to share it?)

Chris shook his head and again, not one word. The mayor requested Chris to look at the people surrounding him. They are what appeared to have a higher status. Men wearing their semi-formal clothes held a higher power. Some of them were investors, and some were politicians like the mayor itself.

“Pagmasdan mo, lahat ito. Kayamanan, kapangyarihan at katanyagan, mapupunta sa iyo. Puwede kang sumabak sa pulitika, o maging mayaman. Hangga’t na mayroong kang titulo sa balikat mo.” (Notice the surroundings around you. There are riches, power, and popularity coming up for you. You can join into politics or become rich and powerful, as long as you have that championship on your shoulders.)

Chris looked at the championship on his shoulders. For him, it sounded like he was trying to give reasons to loathe it. “Inaalok kita ng kontrata kung saan ako ang magiging manager mo sa iyong laban, maging sa Amerika pa man o sa Europa. At kung ako’y nasa likod mo, yumayaman ka at magiging kilala ka sa boung mundo. Bibigyan kita ng mga pamasahe para makalakbay ka sa buong mundo. Ano masasabi mo?” (I will offer you a contract where I will be your manager for your match whether its in America or Europe. And with me on your side, I will make you rich and popular. I will provide you an allowance to travel around the world. What do you say?)

“What the heck is he offering? You’re giving me a reason why I should not be a champion.” Chris thought.

But he didn’t want to rude, so he replied. “Pag-iisipan ko.” (I’ll think about it.)

The investor smiled at him and gave him a business card. “Sige, ito ang calling card ko. Sana matanggap mo ang alok ko sa iyo.” (Okay, here’s my calling card. I hope you would accept my offer.)

Chris stoically nodded at the investor, and he parted ways. Chris shook his head and endured his time at the party. When the festivities are over, he walked home alone. During that time, he found himself a trash can and dump all the business cards given to him.

“Am I a whore to them? I’m a fighter, not a money-monger.”

Chris’s Local Residence
10:30 pm

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Chris was on his chair feeling pale and horrified. His eyes were in trance thinking of what Isidra revealed to him, and the incident happened inside the party. His conscience imposed a heavy burden on the young fighter.


Though he thought of himself as a humble person, his mind denied it and screamed at him that he was not. In reality, he shoved everyone to the face that he was the most talented wrestler in the world of professional wrestling. It threw his humility off the building, and let his arrogance intrude to himself without ever noticing.

Kain, tulog, walang trabaho / 'Di ka ba nahihiya sa aasal mo
(You eat and sleep but remain jobless / Aren’t you ashamed of your manners?)

Chris looked at the title he has won, the Junior Heavyweight Championship. He stood up from his chair and picked it up. He glanced at it trying to recall what is like to be a champion. It was back at 2016 when the young Chris teamed up with his close friend, Serena for him to become a CEW World Heavyweight Champion.

Kahit na anong pangaral sa 'yo / 'Di pumapasok sa 'yong ulo
(Many times you have been taught / But you haven’t learn a single bit)

Chris remembered it well, and he did manage to snatch a title from the company itself. However, the celebration had turned bitter as the championship itself caused tension between Chris and Serena. It became a mess and a crack between their faction, the House of Serena.

Chris began to take notice of his right hand as he held its wrist. It was shaking and twitching like it has a sort of anxiety or something unwary feeling that came from Chris’ mind.


Chris dropped the title involuntarily as his eyes widened. Uncertain anxiety kept choking him and forced him to sit back on his chair. He then glanced at the mirror and saw himself something he loathed before.


Chris saw himself that he became a mess, an arrogant person. He spoke things like accomplishments and other undesirable things conflicting to what he was fighting for. It reminded him of something bitter in his past.


Chris had a terrible period in his career where he has losing streaks. Back at Japan, he entered a tournament known as Passion of the Juniors Cup where he reached up to the finals. Sadly, he let the opportunity slip on his grasp and lost. It led to a bloody feud against the winner of that contest, Cassius Reed.


Cassius Reed and Chris became bitter enemies until suddenly Chris got fed up by the mess he made. His conscience deteriorated, and his self-esteem dropped drastically. Chris recalled some of the worst things in his past: twitter tirade, last match, and funeral.

Chris had enough of those memories. He grabbed the title, swung around and toss it away from him in hopes to make it go away. But it didn’t… He wished that he never win that belt. He didn't remember himself as he has changed ever since the championship win. He became an ignorant, self-righteous, and arrogant monster. He never wanted it to happen.




March 7, 2019
11:45 am

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Chris sat on the chair looking at the mirror. He pondered over the vision he received. He attempted to find its meaning, its answers. He will never forget the words coming from Inang Bayan, the lady herself. “Tandaan mo palagi kung sino ka, anak ko.” He envisioned it detail by detail of its dream, for there was something he was about to decipher it until someone knock at the door.

“Tuloy.” (Come in.)

Entering from his room, it was no other than a woman who slapped at him, Isidra. “Chris, pinapatawag ka ng iyong nanay para kumain, bakit hindi ka bumaba?” (Chris, your mother called you many times for lunch, why didn’t you come?)

There was a moment of silence between the two before Chris answered, “Pakisabi na, mamaya nalang ako kakain.” (Tell her that I will eat later.)

“Bakit? Dahil sa pagsampal ko sa’yo?” (Why? Is it because I slapped at you back then?) Isidra asked in a friendly way this time.

Chris shook his head. “Totoo naman ang sinasabi mo. Nagbago na nga ako, hindi ko alam kung paano ako ibabalik sa dati kong ugali kung saan hindi ko pa nakuha itong titulo.” (You were right all along. I have changed. I don't how to turn back where I have never got this title.)

Isidra patted his shoulders, “Pag-usapan natin.” (Let’s talk about it.)

And they did! Chris shared about the insecurities he had during that night and the vision he had experience. Isidra paid attention to the details of his account. Chris had a lot of his mind trying to obtain an answer. Her response?

“Lahat ito nagsimula dahil pagkasampal ko sa iyong mukha, dahil sa iyong kayabangan. Nais kong itanong sayo kung bakit ka nakaganyan? Bakit nais mong iparating sa Amerika na isa kang kampeon na hindi kaano ang titulo na iyan?” (It all started when I slapped at your face because of your arrogance. I want to ask why you are behaving like this. Why do you want to show the Americans that you hold the title that doesn’t even belong to them?)

Chris answered, “Dahil napupuno ako sa mga pag-aalipusta sa atin, Isidra. Walang paggalang sa atin ang mga Amerikano, dahil tayo’y mga mababa tayo sa kanila. Gusto kong mapatunayan na tayo’y magkasinglakas sa kanila.” (It was because I’m fed off by their discrimination against us. The Americans didn’t respect us, because we are lower than them. I want to prove to them that we are as strong as they are.)

Isidra saw the inconsistency. “Pero andyan si Anthony, hindi ba’t Amerikano siya? Si Hammerstein, magiging kakampi mo sa nalalapit na laban.” (However, Anthony is with you. Isn’t he an American? What about Hammerstein, you’re going to team up with him for your upcoming match.)

“Pero may mga ‘kano ang nag-aapi sa atin dahil sa ating katanyagan, sa ating katayuan at sa ating lahi. Ninais ko ibigay mensahe sa kanila na hindi tayo mahina pero barado ang kanilang tenga sa akin dahil sa kanilang mapagmataas ng puso.” (But they are also some Americans that insulted us because of our popularity, our status, and our race. I want to send a message that we are not weak, but they never listen because of their selfish heart.)

“Naiintindihan ko iyon, Chris. May mga ‘kano na gusto nila tayo’y papaalisin sa kanilang bansa. Nakita ko din ang galit mo diyan sa dalawang babae na iyan ay hindi maalis. Pero kung nais sana, huwag hayaan ang iyong maanghang na salita ang mahila sa iyo sa huli o ang iyong galit sa kanila. Kung minsan, kailangan mong umiwas lang muna sa gulo.” (I understand, Chris. They are some Americans who want us to leave their country. I see that your hatred toward that two women is still there. However, I wish that you shouldn’t let your hurtful words or your hate pull you down in the end. Sometimes, you need to step back from the fight.)

Chris then looked at Isidra like she was into something. “Ibig sabihin, tama ang desisyon ko na umalis sa Amerikanong promosyon?” (Does that mean that my decision on leaving that American promotion is a good thing?)

Isidra agreed then explained, “Mukhang iyan ang ikakabuti sa iyo. Puwede ka nang umalis ka at hindi ka na bumalik sa Amerika. Mayroong mga lugar kung saan pwede kang lumaban. Ang mga taong nasa Canada, gusto ka nilang makita sa iyong laban. O kaya sa Japan, andiyan ang asawa mo si Sakuya, hindi ba?” (I think it’s for the best. You could leave and never come back to America. There are some other places to compete. People in Canada love to see you fight in Canada. Or maybe, you could go to Japan. Your wife, Sakuya was there too, right?)

Chris shook his head, “Malabo na mag-asawa na kami ni Sakuya. Ang kaniyang mga kapatid, ayaw nila sa akin. Kaya noong may oras pa, kumuha ako ng dokumento na hiwalay na kami.” (I think we are no longer husband and wife. Her brother despised me, so during that free time, I asked for some legal documents for us to separate.)

“Hiwalay? Bakit? Ayaw mo na sa kaniya?” (Separate? Why? Don’t you love her anymore?) Isidra was surprised at Chris’ renouncement.

Chris explained, “Iniisip ko na, para sa ikinabubuti sa kaniya, itutuloy ko ang paghihiwalay ko sa kaniya kaysa sa madungisan ang kaniyang pamilya.” (I thought that it was for the best. I’m planning to separate myself from her than to bring more contempt to her family.)

“Chris, iniisip mo ba na isa kang bigo na asawa?” (Chris, are you thinking that you’re a failed husband?) Isidra asked.

“Hindi ko matulungan ang kaniyang tatay sa paggamot niya sa kanser. Ngayon nabalitaan ko na babalik siya sa unibersidad para makatulong. Ano ba ang layunin ko para sa kaniya? Kung sa bagay, naaabala ako sa mabigat na responsibilidad na natanggap ko.” (I failed to help her father in his recovery to cancer. They informed me that she went back to university to help him. What is the point of helping her? Besides, I’m carrying a heavy responsibility.)

Isidra felt pity on the young fighter. “Kaawa-awa ang buhay mo, Chris. Nagiging miserable ka.” (Your life is going to be sad, Chris. You’re becoming miserable.)

“Kahit papaano, katulad ang tatay ko, inialay niya ang kaniyang buhay para sa inang bayan at hindi sa material na bagay. Makuha ito ang tadhana ko, Isidra.” (Look at this way, just like my father, he gave up his life for his motherland and not for other material things. It looks like this is my destiny, Isidra.) Chris answered to which Isidra grew sad for him.

“Pakisabi kay Anthony at sa tatay mo na nagkapagpasya na ako na ituloy ko ang pagpirma ng kontrata sa Canada at Japan sa Abril. Aalis ako sa Amerikanong promosyon pagkatapos ng laban ito. Idadali ko nilang ang pag-alis ko diyan.” (Tell Anthony at your father that I’ve decided to sign the contracts on Canada and Japan in April. I’ll leave that American promotion after this fight. I’ll make it easier.) Chris instructed.

Isidra sighed and nodded. Before she left, Chris added, “Pakisabi kay inay na pababa ako para kumain.” (Also, tell my mom that I’ll go down to eat.)

“Sige.” (Okay.) Then she went out of the room leaving Chris alone. He then sat back to his seat and pondering over the grim future for the young fighter.